Well, hello, world.
I’m slowly emerging from the fourth trimester cocoon, and it’s about time that I pick up the blogging pen a bit more regularly again. I’m not sure what exactly the new “regular” will look like, but I’m hoping for once a week. And while I don’t intend for this to become a “mommy blog,” I’m sure my relationship with Siena will shape both my faith and my yoga, which will in turn shape this blog. I write nonfiction: life elements blend together.
Like these thoughts I have about meditation, presence, and breath–
A few days ago, I was putting Siena down for a nap, and she just would. not. calm. down. She was so tired, but she just does not want to miss anything. Fortunately for me, she also follows my lead.
So I did what any yogi would do: I did a forward fold into her crib and put my face next to hers, forehead to forehead. Then I closed my eyes and breathed long, slow, and deep. I made my exhales audible. Within a minute, her breathing slowed to meet mine, and Siena slid into deep sleep.
To do that, though, I needed to be fully present. To convince Siena to follow my lead, I needed to be right there in her crib, breathing authentically. If I was thinking about the chores I wanted to do while she slept, it wouldn’t have worked—it would have come through in my breathing. She needs me to be present with her on her level, breathing with her.
Thus, I’ve been thinking about motherhood as the practice of being present. Of savoring.
I’ve also been thinking of God as mother – or father (my husband does it too). God as Parent, being present with us.
It occurs to me that meditation is us sitting in God’s presence, trying to calm our own breathing to match the God-breath that sustains us. And God is right there, forehead to forehead, breathing with us.